Tammy came over yesterday and we watched The Passion of the Christ. I didn�t like it one bit. When it was over I filled with rage and hatred. I couldn�t believe that human beings could actually treat each other like that. It made me think of Matthew Shepard and how those people beat him and left him hanging on that fence for dead. It really made us question why Mel Gibson would want to make of movie like this. There were so many people in the street that they could�ve easily taken those guards down and saved Jesus but instead they threw stones and cheered. Everyone I�d talked to when it first came out said they cried when they left the theatre and grown men were weeping like children. We didn�t cry once, we were horrified with the whipping scene and how it showed in great detail the metal hooks digging in and ripping the flesh. When the back was done they flipped him over and started again. Gore doesn�t even begin to describe the scene. Not even in the worst of slasher movies have I seen anything like this.
I�m not one for believing in organized religion anyway but this really made me question my beliefs. How could these men feel such joy from beating a man to near death? How could those 2 boys hate so much that they went on a killing spree at Columbine High school? Is being different so wrong that you should take pleasure in killing someone for being black or gay or Jewish? I guess if you�re a gay black Jew you don�t stand a chance.
It�s Monday and I am feeling the Sunday, I don�t want to go back to work blahs. It�s past noon and I haven�t even showered yet. I�m doing my laundry so I�ll have some clean clothes to wear tomorrow and for the rest of the day I suppose. Margo keeps asking me where I want to go out for my birthday and I keep putting her off. In case I didn�t mention before she wants to take me out and get me drunk on my birthday. For some reason all the girls at work think that if I get drunk enough I�ll loosen up and get laid. �You�re such a great guy. I don�t understand why you don�t have a boyfriend.� Are words I hear daily from her. I don�t like going to bars, in fact I really can�t stand it. The smoking and the loud music, I can�t take it. I think I have a phobia of crowded places. Then when you leave you reek of cigarettes and beer. They of course don�t see it because they are filthy fucking smokers. She wants to invite all her friends to drag me out and none of my friends. I told her Tammy wouldn�t go anyway as I was saving her from the fate that would no doubt be put on her too as she doesn�t like to go either. So I will go and be miserable since Margo, Jessica, Julie, and Echo are all filthy fucking smokers and they will more than likely get me to have one drink and I will prove to them once and for all that it�s not fucking fun for me. I know that you are saying out loud, �Why not just tell her no then?� Because they will keep on me until I do it and maybe if they see how it affects me and that I�m not like them they will back the fuck off me.
Chew on that!